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Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world

no banana @lemmy.world

7mo ago

Unethical relationship advice

37 comments

Wish my wife would fondle my nuts daily to check whatever.
- How loose
- Funnily enough this would reduce cheating in men that cheat.
Jokes on you, she blows afterwards so my balls are nice and tight again
While at it guys, remember that having premarital sex wears your penis out until is as thin as a pencil and you won't be able to satisfy your future wife. That is why you should save your purity for her 😇
- Is it possible my penis isn't small, but my partner is just an unrepentant trollop?
- Marriage is for religious weirdos
  
  Uh, no, it's for a tax break and insurance purposes.
Ummm, that only means he was pissing.
Maybe he just took a leak, because pee is stored in the balls.
This is a "masturbating is cheating" person, yeah?
- I mean, could be masturbating, but after coming home from being out all day?
  
  Boss makes a dollar, i make a dime. That's why i fap, on company time.
  
  After the 2nd shake ya better finish the job, ya'know?
  
  Coming home after being out coming all day
Nah. The only way to know for sure is by taste.
- Personally I go by humidity and vigor
- Or smell
Honey, here i am for my ball check.
- Reminds me of penis inspection day in school
ohhhh, that's why i have such huge balls.
https://youtu.be/YDgTRY9vGCM
- Lol that was the first thing that popped into my head too.
  Don't play me like a fool
  Cuz that ain't keeeeewwewwlll
- Dammit, beat me to it!
Is this even real?
- Certainly feels so after a while
While you're there, they also have a chlorine like musk after load dump.

37 comments