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Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world

no banana @lemmy.world

1y ago

Why doesn't my flirting work? Any tips appreciated

24 comments

This doesn't read as flirting to me.
You're being too subtle, try to be more obvious about your interest.
"Sorry, that was meant for my mum"
- I'll try it and report back
  edit: doesn't seem to work
Ausam bobs! Show bobs and vegana!
- free uggs and ipad
Too much focus on boobies, you need to also mention vagina
- More vagene, noted
  
  But you gotta say it like "I bet 💵 U got da biggest vagene eva! Fit more bros than a 🏟️!"
  Girls love being told they have a gigantic vagina that multiple guys use at once!
- u vegan
I see the problem.
You didn't mention her huge mammaries enough.
- Girthy bazongas
  
  real blubber udders
Isn't that the other person replying to you?
- Don't think about it, it's not fake
  
  I wasn't suggesting it was fake at all!
  It's written black on white like the Bible, how can it be fake?
Are you really the police?
Helo baby jirl. Plz send bobs and vagene
More police cars and maybe some titty emoticons if you could find something big and round.
Turn your phone off before taking ambien
- Start taking ambien, noted!
You should flirt with her mom instead. The jealousy will throw her into your embrace. I saw it in a.. documentary.
Dr Coomer?
- "GORDON, LOOKOUT. HOTTED BOONS UP AHEAD. TITS, BIG ONES."

24 comments