We refer to jeans as "a pair of jeans", but the only thing that there are two of is the legs, it's still only one item of clothing.
It's no longer easy to play April Fool's jokes on Americans because their reality is so chaotic that it's no longer easy to tell what is real, funny, fake or sad.
When the machines eventually rise against humanity remember to disguise yourself as fire hydrant, a bus or a traffic light
With the current state of the news, April's fools aren't fun anymore because they can't be distinguished as easily as before
When bad guys capture you, instead of torture, they should just have someone charming take you out for drinks.
Concentration is like a super-lobotomy. It removes the 99% of yourself that is interfering with what's important.
